I have officially moved into the 2nd trimester phase and I am waiting for all this supposed energy to appear that I hear so much about. Still waiting...... I have been feeling really good and actually feel really no different from pre-pregnancy days except for the weight expansion around my middle. I had to stop the insanity and get some maternity pants and what a difference those make. I can see wearing those forever they are so comfortable! Ok maybe not forever - the big band is not that fashion forward. I have had people at work tell me that I look more pregnant and others tell me (like the dental hygienist) that I don't look pregnant at all. I had my 2nd doctor appointment and it was pretty quick and painless except for the disapproving eye from the doctor over the 7 pounds I have gained since my last appointment. He asked that I don't make a habit of it.... the nerve!! I swear it isn't really all that fair to be weighed each time in varying layers of clothes and shoes. So I immediately began to feel bad and fat and vowed to stop eating....and then Mike told me to get over it. He knew right away that I was bummed by the lecture since I resorted to absolute silence in the car ride home. That boy is really starting to figure me out. I know I really don't eat much more or more often than when I did before pregnancy but perhaps my metabolism is really starting to get back at me. Or maybe it was that 2 orders of fries from McDonald's I just had to have one day because I was absolutely starving and would die on the spot if I didn't get them. I am continuing my count down until I can possibly find out the sex of this baby (or as Kelly said, the sexual orientation...although not really caring to find out if my baby is gay at this point :)). All signs continue to point towards a girl (those old wives tales are great!) so that very well means I will be having a boy.
In other news, I know folks are probably confused as to why Randy chose me out of anyone to call and reveal this grand plan of his to move out. I still don't know why he called me (I am supposed to be the intimidating one remember??) and not sure I ever will. But I do know that I had no influence over what he chose to do. He had his mind made up from the moment our conversation began and as is obvious, I was not able to change it. Perhaps he reached out to me because I am the one least likely to yell, scream, ask a lot of questions, or judge but who knows. My sisters can attest that when you do something I don't like, you will hear about it from me :) Bottom line is that I don't understand or condone what he has done and I told him as such when I talked to him. He doesn't know the first thing about being a mature adult even though that is what he is asking everyone to see him as. He will learn fast and hard and will have to figure things out at some point. My frustration over these parents who so willingly offered him an escape and not once reached out to his parents to give them a heads up as to what he was feeling or planning is beyond belief. I will never understand the motives of those people either. But I do know that some people need to learn the hard way and we have seen countless times with Randy that he is one of those people. My hope is that he one day sees what he gave up and how good he had it. I don't think any of us will truly get what is going through his head but as most boys seem to do, he can only think of himself in the present and not anything in the future. He will address the future when it gets there I suppose. I cannot begin to even imagine what mom and dad are going through and I know they probably feel like some sort of failures. But if I know anything, I know that they are not and should not think of themselves in that way. They have done all that they can to support, love, nurture, and be there for him and I think deep down Randy knows that. Maybe someday he will realize it and tell them that.
As for other goings on, I am so happy for all my sisters who are embarking on great new journeys. New spouses, new babies, new family...all very uplifting situations that we should be focused on.
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2 comments:
And that's my plan.....to focus on the future and all that is good and right. Even in the best of times a parent will question every call they've made, that's why they say it takes a village, it takes many to raise a kid right. Randy has that village but apparently sees it as a village of idiots....
I do think that he will see what we have tried to do for him, he is starting to communicate in small ways, we continue to give him his space. With enough space, he may feel lonely and realize we weren't so bad after all.
I think he may have chosen you because you often appear to lead with your head instead of your heart, he probably knew there would be no hysterics...at least on the outside, he doesn't know you all that well.
As for the weight thing, do like every other woman usually must do when getting weighed, plan for it. Wear the lightest weight clothing possible, or wear layers and remove most of them, wear shoes that can be slipped off and on without alot of hassel, and lastly, don't worry about it. Even at the rate of 7 pounds a month, you'll still not gain as much as I did with you....so, now, where is that Sara Lee coffee cake????
Heh. Maternity pants. :)
Try not to worry about the weight, though. Your body (and the baby) will tell you what it wants for a reason.
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